It isn't easy to save a failing relationship. But you can do it. As Alyssa Petersel, CEO of My WellBeing, tells Bustle, the first thing you need to do is communicate. "Relationships become vulnerable when communication isn't as strong as it can be," she says.
If you want to reset your relationship, you have to be ready for a fresh start, but that starts with a deepened understanding of your love and it starts with accepting yourself. Broken things can be fixed, but the fixing is often harder than the breaking.
Chances are nothing will be solved when you've put a time limit on improving your romance. Instead, give your relationship space to get back on track. Without that pressure, you and your partner will both feel more comfortable spending time together and slowly moving your romance towards the place it should be.
When should I stop trying to save my relationship?
One of the key signs that it's time to break up is if you're finding that you can't connect to your own emotions or feel strongly about your partner's actions. Emotional detachment can happen due to abuse but it can also happen when you're being ignored day in and day out.
The key is never giving up. If you feel you've fallen short with communicating or being present in a family member's life, you don't just end that relationship. If you have a quality person in your life that you love and care about, it's best to try and figure out if there's potential to salvage the relationship.
You have an overwhelming, overall gut feeling that this relationship isn't working; you feel negatively often. You cry, complain or feel anxious about some aspect of the relationship or your partner multiple times a week. You don't enjoy spending time with your partner or need alone time more than usual.
If there is no more active investment in your relationship, it could be a sign that one or both of you have already subconsciously made the decision to call it quits. Interviewing divorce lawyers or speaking to real estate agents to “keep your options open” likely means that you don't really want your options open.
Spending time apart can make your relationship a whole lot healthier, Erickson says, because it gives you both a chance to reconnect with your own values, desires. It'll be easier to connect in a genuine way after you've had some space, as well as a lot more exciting.
And in turn, it's natural to keep going back to this person. But you need this break to clear your mind and reflect. Having regular communication or even checking in with your partner will only muddy things up.
How do you know if your relationship is not worth saving?
If you find it difficult to open up to your partner lately, then you might want to reconsider your relationship. 3- You and your partner hardly spend any time together. Regardless of how hard you try; your partner always cancels on you. When you really love someone, you do your best to find time for them.
It might not be full of passion right now, but if there are still feelings of closeness and intimacy, you're still in love with them. You might not be having sex as often as you once were, but if you're making an effort to be intimate with them and you still enjoy sharing that, there are clearly feelings involved.
“In relationships, red flags are signs that the person probably can't have a healthy relationship and proceeding down the road together would be emotionally dangerous,” explains Dr. Wendy Walsh, PhD, a clinical psychologist who specializes in relationships. Note that red flags in a relationship might not be obvious.
There are many reasons why couples break up. The most common reasons people break up usually involve a lack of emotional intimacy, sexual incompatibility, differences in life goals, and poor communication and conflict resolution skills. There are no wrong or good reasons to break up.